Wednesday, November 2, 2011

29 Reasons You Shouldn’t Date a Tech Entrepreneur



  • Freemium models are your competition at the bar.

  • When you’re talking, they’re thinking about users.

  • They think lusting after 22 year old programmers is okay for grown men/women to do.

  • They make awkward sexual remarks like “I’d call that API”.

  •  They think a startup consists of not having a job, while programming.

  • They think they have multiple startups in the form of multiple unfinished apps.

  • If they’re from NYC, they grow really silly mustaches and wear really tight jeans.

  • If they’re from SF, they wear really tight jeans and grow really silly mustaches.

  • If they’re from DC, they’ll wish they could grow a really silly mustache and have tighter jeans.

  • If they’re in Austin, they’re probably puking on something during SXSW.

  • They think you care about their monetization strategy.

  • They don’t care how hot you are – if you don’t “get it” then you’re toast.

  • They think referencing Paul Graham essays in causal conversation is normal.

  • They have to schedule dates spontaneously 3 weeks in advance.

  • They’re too tired for a booty call.

  • Their exit strategy includes paying him/her.

  • You’ll need to follow them on Twitter to know what they’re up to.

  • You’ll need to follow them on Foursquare to bump into them randomly.

  • You’ll need to pretend you’re not jealous of the quality time they spend with their Siri.

  • Their idea of a date is meeting you at Starbucks for 30 minutes.

  • They keep pushing you to hire a team to manage and grow your personal blog

  • They won’t talk to you if you don’t believe in agile/lean everything.

  • Pillow talk sometimes includes references to Jack Dorsey.

  • Pillow talk also includes “when I raise that round baby…”

  • Ship early, ship often does not include gifts on your birthday.

  • Fail fast applies to your relationship.

  • Vacation includes co-working sessions, networking, Skype, and writing proposals.

  • When they wake up, the first thing they reach for is their iPhone.

  • You’ll get friend requests from people even they’ve never met in person.

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